I grew up in Whittier California in an upscale neighborhood known as Friendly Hills. My father was an Ear, Nose & Throat Specialist and Plastic Surgeon. Our next door neighbor also graduated from USC Medical School with my dad and was an OBGYN.
He and his wife gave birth to four boys in which the oldest and youngest were severely mentally challenged. Their second oldest son, Greg was mildly mentally challenged and their third son had no disabilities and graduated from USC and became one of the top CEO’s in the Country.
My mom was a stay-at-home mom and we were also a family of four children. All of the kids in the neighborhood would hang out at our home. There were roughly 26 homes on our connecting streets (Cielo Vista & Lodosa) and we were known as the “Lodosa Gang.”
My oldest brother, Ray was extremely mischievous and had at least eight boys his age that was part of the Lodosa Gang. My brothers and sisters were all two years apart and there were a total of 60 kids or so that lived in the neighborhood.
We were more than an active bunch, we were downright busy. We played sports constantly, had egg fights, papered houses, climbed trees, the normal stuff that kids did and more. We were constantly around each other. Greg always hung out at our house and became a part of our family. He went everywhere with us and was always welcomed with open arms.
Greg got a job at Presbyterian Hospital following school where our dads had practiced medicine for over 35-years until one day my dad contracted Staff Infection and unexpectedly died in 1996. Greg, from what I hear, has never missed a day of work nor has ever been tardy. He is also a very active member of his Church. His parents moved to Coronado Island and Huntington Beach and left the Whittier home for Greg but recently moved back.
My mom sold our Whittier home following the Quake in 1987 and moved to Newport Beach. Most of the other neighbors have sold their homes and have moved on. Greg and I still stay in contact and I visit him when I go to Whittier.
Greg called me a month or so ago and whenever we talk, it is apparent that he misses his neighbors and friends which made me think about the importance of transition for disabled adults.
Had Greg moved into his own home in a new neighborhood would that have made a difference? Would his new community embrace him like our family and neighbors did or would he still be lonely? Greg is in his 50’s now and yearns for neighbors that he once had and that to me is a very sad reality.
When I speak to parents and they state that they have plans of leaving their home to their disabled child, will they feel the same way that Greg does? Will the neighbors that they have gotten to know and who have all moved on be left with no one to socialize or visit with?
Is transition skill building like any maturing adult also important to a disabled adult’s future for the mere fact that it forces our kids to adjust to change so they can cope with the realities in life?
I have started to contact my family, our childhood neighbors, and friends and have shared Greg’s story and have asked that they try and make an effort to call or visit Greg when they are in the neighborhood. Everyone needs Neighborly love!
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